Nolan Finley and Stephen Henderson, esteemed Detroit journalists and founders of “The Civility Project," came to speak during Eastern Michigan University’s Constitution Day celebrations to encourage healthy, civil discourse.
Finley and Henderson, a Republican and a Democrat respectively, were frequently pitted against each other on radio shows throughout their journalism careers. Coming from different sides of the political spectrum, their arguments were intense and broadcasted for anyone to see.
Casual conversations before and after segments resulted in a forming friendship between the two men. It wasn’t until they participated in StoryCorps, a program that, according to their website, is dedicated to telling the stories of humanity, that things began to change. Finley and Henderson sat face to face, and after 10 years of knowing each other, began to truly get to know each other beyond their political affiliations.
“We sat in this little Winnebago trailer for an hour, two hours, and we just didn’t argue, which was unbelievable to spend that much time together and not be at each other's throats,” said Finley. “We just asked questions about each other. How did you grow up? What influences you in terms of decision-making?”
These questions and more allowed the men to not only form a deeper friendship, but a deeper understanding as well. This is what they hope to create through the Civility Project — more conversations that are focused on understanding, instead of distaste. The two men believe that this is especially important when considering the current political climate.
“Too often our discourse today has evolved into hate, and so that's why we’re sort of pushing back against the growing hatred in this country,” said Finley.
According to their website, The Civility Project’s goal is to build healthy disagreement and constructive dialogue while teaching people how to build civility in their relationships. The Project holds workshops to teach how to have productive conversations and to create a safe environment to talk about contentious topics. They believe this is important especially when there are disagreements. Which, the men laugh, still frequently happens between them.
“There's almost nothing I can think of that we can't argue about, but we learned how to do it in a way that other people could learn from,” said Henderson.
The Civility Project has four pillars: dropping assumptions, setting reasonable expectations, listening, and staying in the work, meaning commitment. The two men believe that these are some of the most important factors to stick to when having civil discourse. By focusing on having a conversation, not a competition, the men hope that hate and anger can make room for honest dialogue and understanding.
“We’re not trying to solve the societal incivility problem,” said Henderson. “We’re trying to get people to understand that they have the ability as individuals to change the way they interact with the people who are closest to them.”
Both men believe it’s important to have these conversations on college campuses. From what Finley’s observed, the conversations they’re hoping to facilitate via the Civility Project, don’t always happen easily at school.
“It is increasingly difficult for students on college campuses to engage openly and honestly with each other,” said Finley. “It's a lot of negative consequences for doing that at a lot of places. So we’re trying to help people learn to do it in a non-threatening, civil manner, to engage in productive conversations without getting angry.”
Henderson emphasizes the importance of continual learning, both in and out of the classroom.
“College campuses are supposed to be about inquiry and curiosity, and a lot of what we’re talking about is using that to talk with people who are really different from you, think differently, and maybe don't see things in any way that you do. This is, in some ways, the perfect setting to have that conversation,” said Henderson.
For more information on The Civility Project, please visit greatlakescivilityproject.com.
